Before you read the rest of this I want you to know I thought long and hard about whether or not to share the following information with you all. One of my guides kept pushing me to share a short version of my personal story in case it can help some reading it to seek help if they are depressed and feel like they are all alone. I plan on compiling a list during my healing time for the mental health crisis line in every state. So please if you feel like you’re all alone and no one would understand how you are feeling email me at ladybeltane@aol.com. if the information you will be readung about me makes you think I am a weaker person than you thought believe me the opposite is the truth as it takes a strong woman in my position in this coven to be honest about what I am going through right now.
For so long people with depression, anxiety and other mental health illnesses have been looked down upon and even shunned by family and friends. So they try to hide how they are feeling. Some wind up in the Summerlands by their own doing, some become street people, but the majority just hide behind a smile while saying their ok or fine.
This is what I have been doing since my knee surgery and the place I loved working shut down. I have dealt with clinical depression, anorexia, and a anxiety disorder for many years. Thankfully my anorexia is still under control but the other two things are raging right now to the point that I don’t want to do anything including get up and dressed. I asked Priestess Hypatia to take over CL for a couple of weeks so with my doctors and Kwan Yin’s help I can turn my downward sprail back into an upward one. I thank you all for the love, help, and support you’ve freely given me. But right now I’m so low I don’t feel I deserve any of it. I promise myself and you to come back the strong woman and leader I was before I allowed my depression and anxiety fully back into my life. If you have any questions for me about this post please email me and I will answer you as soon as I can. I ask that you please be patient a waiting my reply. Than you.
The follow links are suggested reading put here with the hope that it may help at least one person reading it or that it may help a friend or family of someone reading it.
Information from John Hopkins about Clinical Depression:
information on Clinical Depression from Mayo Clinic:
Information about Anxiety Disorders from psychiatric.org
https://www.psychiatry.org/patients-families/anxiety-disorders/what-are-anxiety-disorders
Information on Anxiety Disorders from WedMD.com:
You know it breaks my heart to read this. I know we have talked many times and you should know damn good and well you are not alone. I started out considering you a dear friend, I now call you sister. You are like family to me and for you to say you are all alone, no sister, you are not. You should know that. I will do anything in the world I can for you. I am always here for you, if you don’t know that by now, then there is no need in me even telling you. I love you and you know that. You can always talk to me. I have known for sometime something has been wrong. I am glad you have finally figured it out on your own. I have sensed it for a while now but how do you tell someone they are depressed and need help. I guess I should have but I didn’t. I am very sorry for that. I can guarantee you it will never happen again. Get the help you need. Call me, talk to me, whatever, I am here for you, you know that. Just get well, sis. I love you and I want the old Lady B back.
I say this from the bottom of my heart, I love you, B. You are my sister and my family.
Lady of the Abyss
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Dear Lady A,
Logically I know I’m not alone and have a great support system between family, friends, my hubby, and doctor but the emotional part of me tries to isolate me and the further down I spiral the more I feel I’m all alone. It’s not rational I know but depression and anxiety throw being rational out the window. I consider you my sister and he boys my nephews so you are definitely part of my family. The more I come out of the dark places in my mind the more I will want to reconnect with people. I’m down but I’m not out yet.
I’ll call again soon even if it’s just to leave a message to bug you with. ;0}
Love ya very much dear sister,
Lady B
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